Obituary of Denise Maxine Lourwood

Denise Maxine Lourwood  was born in Portland, Oregon on January 18th, 1961.  Denise was the third daughter of Maxine Edith Mitchell (Smith) of Brooks, Iowa and Ivan Lester Smith of Excelsior Springs, Missouri. 

     Despite her careful diligence, isolation and consideration to others, she contracted the Corona virus in December of 2020.  On January 28th 2021 she passed away at Legacy hospital after 30 days of fighting for her life.  She was a victim of the global Covid -19 pandemic just after her 60th birthday. 

     Before she left us, Denise wanted to work on a couple of things with her family and then treat herself to a few years of retirement. Her death seems so unfair.  She didn’t want to die. She wanted a dog and for her boys to be settled and happy.  She had simple wishes for simple happiness. Those of us that are left behind missing her must now carry a little more laughter and experience a little more joy to fill her place.

    

     Everyone who knew Denise, knows that the Oregon beach was her ‘go to’ resting place. She went there as often as she could but not often enough. When we picture her retirement years (that she was robbed of) we see her sitting in a comfy foldout chair near the ocean. She’s sitting with a “doggie” in her lap, watching the waves. The sun is shining and there is a light breeze.  She is calm and there is a grin on her upturned face. She’s wearing sunglasses and her toes are buried in the sand. We see her friends and family walk down and open their chairs to sit with her.  They laugh and chat and pet her dog.  A handsome man brings them snack plates and drinks. Later, they have a bonfire as the sun sets. It’s a perfect, heavenly day.  

    

Here is a quick history on Denise's life:     

      When she was 4 years old, her father Ivan left Oregon to return to Kansas. After that, Denise was raised solely by her mother, Maxine.  She grew up in Southeast Portland with her mom and her sisters Barbara and Sue Ann.  Denise has two older brothers Duane and Robert Stuva who had moved out and started families of their own by the time she entered school at Woodstock elementary.  Denise also had older half-siblings in Kansas that she met several times but lost contact with as an adult.  

     As a child Denise could be described as precocious and comical. Her flashing, dark brown eyes and big personality caused her to light up any room. One picture of Denise at 4 years old wearing a floor length, lavender satin princess dress rivals any Disney character. 

     Denise loved animals. She always had a pet companion. She was very devoted to their care and comfort. Perhaps this came from her playtimes with Wags, her childhood dog whom she taught tricks and dressed up.  Denise’s neighborhood was full of kids to play with and her home was full of love.  Even though money was tight and food was limited her mother Maxine was very frugal and provided well. In this environment Denise learned responsibility and to cherish family and friends. Her sisters were a bit older than she was and her mom worked evenings.  As well, she had little or no contact with her dad (No social media back then) so sometimes she felt a little alone or left out. Because of this, she realized the importance of belonging and connecting to others. She was very close to her mother.

     Denise matured quickly.  Her beauty and intelligence got her noticed by people. At a young age this at times wasn't the best combination but she did well and landed a job and the ability to be on her own right after high school.  She returned home several times before landing her career job at Pacific Northwest Bell (USWest & Qwest.) Soon after, She met and married James Lourwood. She gave birth to twins Matthew and Ryan on October 16th.  Time passed and before she knew it the boys were starting school. They bought a new house in Clackamas where they enjoyed fun times in a new neighborhood of young families.  Soon after, her job was downsized and she needed to find a new profession. James and Denise divorced and Denise found a new career at Kaiser Permanente.  She continued to rent homes in the area to keep the boys in the Clackamas school district.  They lived in a nice home in Happy Valley for over 20 years.  

     As the boys got older, Denise poured herself into her work.  She became very knowledgeable and people looked to her for information and guidance.  Sometimes it seemed to those close to her,  that she worked too much and wasn’t taking time for herself. She never complained though, she seemed to take great pride in her work. 

James and Denise divorced and Denise found a new career at Kaiser Permanente.  She continued to rent homes in the area to keep the boys in the Clackamas school district.  They lived in a nice home in Happy Valley for over 20 years.  

     As the boys got older, Denise poured herself into her work.  She became very knowledgeable and people looked to her for information and guidance.  Sometimes it seemed to those close to her,  that she worked too much and wasn’t taking time for herself. She never complained though, she seemed to take great pride in her work.  Her job enabled her to provide for her boys. They were her constant focus. 

    Friends say Denise always made their days better. She worked for about 40 years and in that time she made an impression on many, many coworkers. They too report that she was wonderful to work with and always made the workplace fun. They looked to her for information on work matters as well they considered her their friend. She was always sending messages or making  quick calls to check in. Her friends say they all felt like they were her best friend.  Nothing felt phony or forced and she always listened to them. She had friends that appreciated her support in their time of need and they say she remembered to check on them long after others stopped.  Her work friends say she made a connection with each of them; be it dogs or vacation destinations. Everyone she worked with said she made them laugh. Considering we spend eight hours a day at work, Denise considered work friends as her family. Denise also had very  supportive childhood friends; Linn, Glenna, Alisha and Denise were always  there for each other. Her friends and co-workers have proven themselves very giving and kind during tough times and her boys and family greatly appreciated it.  

     Denise’s family has many hilarious stories about her.  They have many loving stories about her, too.  She was definitely one in a million. She commanded the room and made events super joyful.  It was like, “We’re gonna have fun dammit!” She always brought little gifts and party favors to family gatherings. She loved Christmas lights and music. She always laughed and made others laugh. She absolutely adored her family- from her mom to her great nieces and nephews. She was very generous. 

     Denise tended to put everyone else before herself.  All throughout her life, Denise was dealt some cruel financial blows that she did not cause. She always worked hard and several times people took advantage of her love.  Despite setbacks, she always forgave people and started her life over from scratch. She met all the challenges with determination, but that meant she may not have cared for herself the way she should. However, by the end of her life she had finally rebuilt what she had at the start - It was important to her to show society she had good standing and was trustworthy with finances and responsibilities.

    

 

    Denise is gone from earth but she left us a lot of things; The memories we have of her, the things we wanted to say or do, the laughter and the connections.  It seems odd that someone’s life can be summarized in a few paragraphs- But look at the love in them!  Read between the lines. It is a magnificent tribute to Denise that so many people loved her and will miss her. We can also rest in knowing she is having a wonderful time in heaven where we will see her again. 

 

This summer or early fall (when it is safe) we will have a celebration of life in Denise’s honor. If it moves you to make a tribute to her, please consider a gift to an animal rescue agency. She had a big heart for animals that are homeless and the $5 spent on a card would be better used towards these animals’ care. Also, Denise would want everyone to know how very much she loves you and how much she depended on your prayers during her illness and journey to paradise.  

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